Where is your self esteem?

What is it about young ladies that makes them feel that their identity is defined by a man? Or what about middle aged women who are still searching for that right one? What is it that makes women feel that they are inadequate until a man comes along and tells them that they are beautiful? Why do we as women have a problem loving ourselves?

When I look in the mirror I see a beautiful woman who is educated, loving, caring, trustworthy, down to earth and honest, among many things. But I did not always feel that way about myself. I used to actively search for love in all the wrong places with all the wrong guys looking for acceptance and love, but when it all failed I would sit there wondering what was wrong with me. I've been through it, but now I am a completely different person. My life and my situations didn't change until I fell in love with me. I learned to love who I was and to be comfortable in my own skin.

Self respect, self love and self worth is something that I see missing in a lot of women. It really bothers me now when I see a woman crying because a man left her or cheated on her. I get enraged when I hear men talk about women as if they are a piece of meat because we are so much more than that. We are worth so much more than that.

Women need to learn how to boost their own self esteem. We need to learn how to love ourselves and how to define ourselves without relying on the thoughts and opinions of others. Any man who cannot respect you means you nothing but harm. Any man who can't be faithful to you, is not worth the tears or the time and definitely not worth carrying the title of your "boyfriend."

Proverbs 18:22 says that "he who findeth a wife, findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord. " We were not meant to go out in the streets to find a man, we were meant to be found. Someone once told me that a woman should be so lost in God, that a man has to seek Him in order to find her. We focus all of our attention on men trying to please them, but how much attention do we put into pleasing God?

Being in love is a beautiful feeling, but its so much better when the feeling is mutual. You cant expect a relationship to last if he doesn't love you back. He can say that he loves you a thousand times, but I believe that love is an action word. Make him show you that he loves you. If he isn't willing to do that then maybe he is not the one that God made for you.

Stop settling for mediocre men, you will only hurt yourself in the long run. I met a woman the other day at a comedy show. She and her husband have been together for a long time and when she introduced her husband to me and my friend she said, "every woman should have one of these. This is a good man, every girl should have one of these!" That let me know that true love does exist, but we can't go out actively seeking a man thinking that every man will be a good man....that's just not gonna happen! So be patient and wait for God to reveal him to you. In the mean time work on you. Focus on God and building your self esteem. Work on realizing who you are and what you are worth. Once you realize it, you wont even need a man to define who you are.

Love you 1st.